New Year, Same You
The start of a new year can be a time of immense optimism. Your conversations or social media feeds may be filled with people brimming with excitement discussing goals, resolutions, hopes and dreams. They’re eager to start fresh and have high hopes for what the year can bring. You may even be one of these people.
‘Tis the Season
It makes sense to try out something new or set a goal at the start of the year. We are used to marking our time in familiar increments. The beginning of a new calendar year is one of those markers we are conditioned to experience in this way. Not to mention, discussions of new year’s resolutions are abundant in the last few months of the year into January.
I bet you’ve seen or maybe even participated in certain challenges, like Whole30 or Dry January. Maybe you’ve joined a gym with a membership starting on January 1st. Or set a goal to implement a budget in the new year. Whatever your resolution, there is an energetic force that can feel incredibly motivating leading up to and into the beginning of the year.
Inevitably though, the energy fades. Have you ever gone to a gym during the first week of January vs. the first week of February? A bit different, huh? Gyms can go from a place where there is a line to get onto a machine to a ghost town in a blink.
I’ve even heard a name for this phenomenon. It’s called “Quitter’s Day” and it describes the day when many people fall off or give up on their resolutions. This happens because it can be really hard to follow through with these aspirations without other changes and accountability in place ahead of time.
Why Does the Energy Fade?
Need More Planning
One reason it might be hard to stick to goals and resolutions is because there wasn’t enough planning involved. Is the goal actually realistic for your life? Have you thought about when you’d engage in the new behavior? Which days, at what time, and with what frequency?
Planning ahead and putting things on a calendar can help. SMART goals (ones that are specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, and time-bound) are discussed often for a reason. They help with accountability.
Add Value to Your Goals
Another reason might be because it was an arbitrary goal to begin with. You are the expert on yourself. If you are being honest, why are you setting these goals or resolutions in the first place? Having a strong why, that is value-based, can be helpful for accountability anytime you set out to achieve something. It’s the difference between following a trendy diet to lose a target amount of weight vs. cultivating a healthy lifestyle because you want to feel strong and energetic enough to keep up with your kids.
It can be easy to get sidetracked or lose interest in things that don’t really matter to you or aren’t realistic. And even when what you are aiming for feels important and achievable, it can still be really hard to create new habits. And when things don’t go exactly as planned, it can be quite easy to get discouraged or view it as a total failure.
The flipping of the calendar from December 31st to January 1st marks a new year but does not invoke a magical force creating a new you.
You’re Still the Same Person
Change is hard and resolutions can be artificial. Keep in mind that December you is the same person that will be implementing any movement toward your goals. Set future you up for success by being thoughtful, kind, and realistic.
Build Self-Awareness
It is important to build self-awareness. What is of importance to you and why? What sorts of things typically present obstacles for you? Is it time management? Is it negative self-talk? Is it difficulty setting boundaries? Identifying and working on these things can help you overcome typical challenges you face and move toward value-based living.
Most Importantly…
Be kind and gracious with yourself. Celebrate any wins you get, even if it is just a single day. Remember that one hiccup does not erase all that came before nor does it preclude future success. Encourage yourself. See each new day, moment, or week, as a new opportunity to continue moving toward where you want to be.
Summary/TL;DR
New Year’s resolutions can feel exciting, but the energy often fades quickly. Change is tough, and setting arbitrary or unrealistic goals can lead to frustration. Instead of focusing on fleeting resolutions, build self-awareness to understand what truly matters to you and why. By setting realistic, value-based goals and being kind to yourself through the process, you can create lasting change—without the pressure to be a “new you” overnight.